Overdose or is this just regular?

I have been seeing alot of him lately and honestly, i am feeling a little uncomfortable. He has never been home so early or rather, we have never spent so much time together on weekdays! Ever since he tendered, he's been pretty free at work and that explains why i am seeing alot more.

I am kinda used to the fact that i am always home alone, managing stuff on my own but now, he's actually at home watching TV with me. Some might say that this' the "normal" life & that the one i was leading in the past yr was absolutely "abnormal" for a newlywed.

Well, all i know is that i am getting uncomfortable spending so much time together. Now, i have to think of interesting stuff to do together on wkends, where to go, what to try... I am not too used to this lifestyle. I think having little time together makes us treasure the precious moment & when u have alot on your hands, u start to get a little lost...

I think this'll maintain for a while, even in the new role (since the markets don't work 24/7) so i better get used to it.

Being a merlion

This was exactly the scene late last night. He came home from a round of drinks with his soon-to-be-ex colleages and well, being a non-fan of alcohol, he threw up everything that he ate.

I guess the boys must have "tortured" him hard & well, from the grouses in between the pukes, he vaguely said that he had many shots.

This was the 1st time i had witness him being a merlion. I guess the previous time was when he was in the US & thankfully, i wasn't around becoz the mess from the puke was awful. I had to wash the clothes & well, the floor. Even now there seems to be a lingering smell of puke in the toilet (don't know if it's psychology but i swear there's a smell).

Eye-opener, though not an experience that i'd want ever again. Hate cleaning up after others.

On this day 1 year ago, we said "i do"

Yes, it's been 365 days without me knowing it. Someone once told me that the 1st yr of marriage is always the toughest - u live together & start getting to know 1 another inside out, tolerate living habits, overdosage of time together on weekends... For me, i have to agree that the 1st year was tough and there were roadbumps, ironically not becoz of living habits but external factors such as work related stress.

I have to agree that there were times in this 1 yr, i had never been more unhappy. KL was unhappy at work & well, that affected me too. Now that he has decided to leave and start afresh elsewhere, i really hope, from the bottom of my heart, that life together will really be happier. We should be moving into our new home in the 4th quarter & i really do look forward to that. Not becoz it's a new "shelter" over my head but for the fact that it's really MY home and also signifies a fresh start for both of us.

On this very day, we thought that we really needed to try out things that we have never done before, even while we were dating. A trip to the zoo & an indulgent meal at Morton's really made the day go fab and left a beautiful memory in my heart. I cross my fingers that going forwards, he'll be happier at work & of course, our marriage will be a happy one too.

As the saying goes "marriage opens up your eyes". I can't agree more but ironically, not "open my eyes" to my partner but really, a marriage is sheer hard work.

1 year into thirty-hood

It's been a while

This must be one of the longest window period since i posted something here. Maybe i didn't wanna face up to my feelings of unhappiness. Maybe i didn't know how to start. All i know is that i am so tired...

Work has been demanding & well, everyone hits a career roadbump once in a while i think i hit mine now, real hard. A "glass ceiling" is inserted and not sure if it's really for my own good but well, i just kinda resent it.

As for the private life, it's just tiring. It's been a while since i felt internal happiness. I sigh alot lately... & the best part, i don't know what to do with it. Does life always make a sport out of humans? I ask myself this question all too frequent lately.